28 November 2010

For Serious, Dude

Dear Joey Galloway,

Guess who has two thumbs and isn't sad to see you released?  THIS GIRL!  What will I not miss the most about you?  How you couldn't catch the effing football.  For serious, dude.  By the way, as established, you're super old, so don't you think that it's about time to shorten "Joey" to "Joe"?  You're not Sonny Jurgensen, for God's sakes; besides, it's not like we can call him "Son Jurgensen."  It just won't work.

Anyway, I'm gonna get back to watching this game, but I just wanted to tell you to retire like you should have done a few years ago--or go play for the Cowboys.  Whichever.

Peace out, cub scout,



Hankazoid said...

Joey would be the second best receiver on the beloved Bears, of course Belicheat can put his magic hands on him and heal, can Joey speak Canadian?

Adam said...

Pretty sure I've heard a couple of games called by aforementioned Jurgensen and uttered the same words..."For serious, Dude?"

Karen said...

@Hankazoid, I'm pretty sure that Joey is worthless at everything, even something as simple-minded as speaking Canadian.

@Adam, you better have meant, "For serious, Dude? How could anyone be better at calling Redskins games than you?" because I will not accept any criticisms about Sonny Jurgensen. In fact, when people bring up his infamous drunk driving, I demand that they compliment him on being one of the best drunk Redskins drivers ever.

Hankazoid said...

Sonny and Sam are institutions, they made that Monday Night debacle from a few weeks ago listenable...I will admit when the alternatives are Mike, Jaws & Chucky or Marv & Boomer(oh god) anybody would be better, but Sam and Sonny still know football and also how to make a crap game entertaining...also they demonstrate weekly their abilities far outweigh the Skins' staff.